11 Years Ago… My 9/11 Story

September 11th

11 years ago today I lost my best friend, Saranya (Susie).

I was sitting in my law school dorm room when the first plane hit. Susie worked for Cantor Fitzgerald. She had just emailed me to update me on girly stuff. Her email was light and funny, I could hear the giggling in her words. 

I remember not understanding what was happening. Not remembering which building she worked in. Not knowing what floor she worked on. I called her over and over again but I assumed she was fine, of course she was. And then as we gathered in the law school auditorium, and watched the first building fall to the ground on a large screen, reality started to settle in.

But there was no giving up. We formed a search party, meeting daily at her family’s apartment to strategize. Going from hospital to hospital. Chasing one false lead after another. Someone saw her on TV. Someone found a name similar to hers in a nearby hospital. Yet all the hospitals were empty. Everyday we waited patiently for the Cantor Fitzgerald survivor updates. There were never any updates. And that email was the last time I ever heard from her.

I didn’t realize how much her loss changed my life until one day, months later, my father and step-mother pointed out what a different person I was. I didn’t know what they were talking about. But they described to me all the changes they saw, and it all made sense.

I learned more from that loss than any experience of my life. It taught me the value of life, a lesson I’ve never forgotten. And so I stopped wasting time on many of the trivial things that used to plague my mind, heart and attention. I stopped letting myself feel run over by life or by people. Her loss helped me take the reins of my own life in a way I had never done before. 

Today I remember my friend, her beautiful heart, and all she taught me about friendship and what it means to be a good person. Her love was the purest love I’ve ever known, and I was blessed to have her in my life for as long as I did.   

Susie, I loved you then, like I love you now, and will love you forever…

Never forgotten… 

{photos courtesy of facebook friends}